Penrith Panthers overlord Phil Gould has taken advantage of this week’s Halloween festivities by dumping the contracts of unwanted Panthers players onto unsuspecting trick or treaters.
Gould’s love of offloading his players on a whim had remained in check so far this offseason, as the Ivan Cleary coaching saga had taken up the bulk of his time.
However, with Cleary’s signature now confirmed the Panthers GM has once again turned his attention to wheeling and dealing his players, sneaking contracts in amongst the Halloween goodies for the neighbourhood kids.
‘Gus was very nice when we knocked on his door and really eager to hand out treats to my kids,’ said a parent of some eager trick or treaters.
‘It wasn’t until we got home that we found out why – my eldest daughter’s gift bag contained a few bite-sized Milky Ways, a strawberry Oak and the remaining two years of James Tamou’s deal,’ she told us.
‘Now I’m going to have to help her negotiate a buyout with another club because we sure as hell can’t afford to pay the guy 15 grand a week.’
However, Gould’s ruse almost ended in disaster as the contract of Nathan Cleary accidentally got mixed in with the discards, only to be saved by some youthful impatience.
‘A few seconds after I closed the door I heard the young fella getting all upset about getting a piece of paper with Nathan’s name on it, but luckily I was able to think on my feet and get the kid to exchange it for a couple of Oaks.’ he said.
While it’s unlikely Gus’s ploy will hold up in court, it’s clear that the Panthers boss is ready for another round of offseason shenanigans.